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Friday, November 9, 2012

I'm sitting at my desk, the weather is awful, I just spilled coffee on my boss, and He is on his way to a meeting with a shirt that has coffee stains, I guess you could say it's a good day... But instead of worrying I'm sitting here wondering how the hell I'm going to get me a job in New York City in the Film industry, firstly everyone in New York wants to be in showbiz, secondly I'm all the way in South Africa, yes I know the world has become joined via web and cyber space but still... I feel like I'm already at a disadvantage before I've even begun... My dream is and always has been to make movies, if not starring in one then definitely behind the scenes... I'd like to think I've taken the right steps to bring myself closer to my dream, and what better way than to go to a place where the art is respected and taken so seriously, if I'm going to do something I need to do it big... That moment has come again where I just want to pack my bags, run and chase my dreams, but I'm a bit reluctant, perhaps the very thought of what stands before me should i pursue is what scares me... the hardwork, the fact that I will be exposing myself to the world, feeling naked, having to pull everything in me to try and make it happen, then my worst fear, what if I don't succeed, what if everything I do is in vain, what if in the end it isn't what I was meant to do or what I thought I wanted... I stand to lose more by staying, the very fact that everyday I feel like I'm not doing enough, that I'm standing by and watching other people live my life, that is more than I can bear... and so I brace myself, prepare for the journey ahead, with ambition, passion and most importantly God on my side, I prepare to conquer... New York City here I come... :)